"The Antelope Party" - Behold, the cringiest play of the year, complete with MAGA hats and Brohoofs by


It's an absolute fever dream stretched across 99 pages. The script, is riddled with phrases like "Brohoof" and "Pegaslap" and "Look, whatever a clopper is, I’m not a clopper, okay?"
It is likely to go down as the cringiest play about bronies ever conceived, and tickets go for up to $70 each. The play touches on everything from clopping to assault and 9/11 references.

It's called "The Antelope Party" and is the brainchild of Eric John Meyer and is hosted by Theater Wit in Chicago.

Let's dive in.

Here's the synopsis:
The Antelope Party By Eric John Meyer
Directed by  Jeremy Wechsler
Theater Three Theater Wit
The Rust Belt Ponies Meet Up Group for Adult Fans of My Little Pony has gathered in Ben's apartment, but two of their company have not yet arrived. A new recruit seems unusually shy and curiously paranoid about a local neighborhood watch group. And what happened to their pegasister friend, Maggie?
This amazing and timely new comedy explores the rise of a new social order and how the currents of history, normalization and fear can sweep up even the most generous bronies of Equestria...

Wew. Lad.
The descriptions of the characters read as follows:

"Characters
Ben: a male POC Brony* in his late 20s to early 30s
Shawn: a male, white Brony* in his mid to late 20s
Rachel: a female Brony* of any race in her late 20s to early 30s
Doug: a male Brony* of any race in his late 20s to early 30s
Maggie: a female POC Brony* in her mid to late 20s
Jean: a female conspiracy theorist of any race in her mid to late 30s "

Let's take a look at some selected lines from the script, to get a taste of what this TWO HOUR LONG play will be like:

(SHAWN, wearing a full-body My Little Pony costume of the character Pinkie Pie)
SHAWN
I used to wear a fedora. 
---------
BEN 
If you’re a clopper, I want you out.
JEAN  
Look, whatever a clopper is, I’m not a clopper, okay? It’s just that once you started talking,
I—I don’t know, I— 
Doug wearing shirt and tie rushes in through the front door. 
DOUG 
They got Maggie! 

---------

JEAN 
I didn’t know people still dressed up like My Little Pony either. 
SHAWN 
So you thought we were a bunch of 9/11 conspiracy people? 
JEAN 
We call ourselves Truthers.  

--------

 BEN
Shawn, I don’t usually like to pull rank, but since you brought it up, I’d like to remind you that I am the senior ranking Brony
---------

BEN 
Let’s just play the game, turn this place into Equestria, and everything will be twenty percentcooler.
---------

Who is this? And why is she tied up?
RACHEL
Are you really trying to act like you don’t know?
Didn’t they tell you we caught the spy?

Sweet baby Jesus.

There's just so much to unpack here, it's really quite spectacular.
If you have shitloads of cash and liquor on hand, live near Chicago, and are brave enough, you can get tickets for up to $70 over here.

Comments (11)

  1. 2018’s off to a great start.

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  2. Godspeed. I don't know what they were thinking when they made this.

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    Replies
    1. be me
      >start reading
      "I really hope the playwright did his due diligence."
      >characters are already more cult-like and only marginally less autistic than actual channers in the first paragraph and using strange abbreviations

      Damn, we had a good run though.

      Delete
  3. I can't believe this is real. I can believe someone thought up something this stupid, but I can't believe any theater would actually put on something like this.

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  4. a google cache copy from the full pdf:
    https://mega.nz/#!IcVznb7C!_EJpaiecX-dcnGGyEN2SDtyaj04MkCv3kilx00YPnCc

    ReplyDelete
  5. >If you want more context, I recommend the trailer for the documentary Bronies: The Extremely Unexpected Adult Fans of My Little Pony.

    Just the trailer though, not the whole thing.

    ReplyDelete
  6. This is an actual play?

    And I thought "Bronies: The Musical" was bad enough...

    ReplyDelete