Summer is on the down-slope here in God’s hemisphere, and to finish off the waning days, 4chan held its biannual imaginary divegrass tournament,
Despite being the winners of the 2015 Summer Cup, /mlp/ went into the cup as the perpetual underdog, having been knocked out of the 2016 Winter Cup in the Round of 16. A number of commenters in /4ccg/ and elsewhere had been saying all year long, “This is definitely /o/’s year,” but /mlp/ proved in the end, that horsefuckers yield to no man.
The opening group stages left much to be desired for our fair board. We lost handily to /o/, humilated but not out for the count with a final score of 3-6, and tied with /u/, where Homucifer managed to tie up our >most dangerous lead by scoring a cheeky 90+, bringing the final score to 2-2 /mlp/. At this point, many mulpers were ready to be relegated back to the Babby cups, having to overcome some really difficult odds: needing to beat /vr/ by two points in order to qualify.
|/mlp/: "Need to win by two to qualify? Those are some nice odds, it'd be a shame if we overcame them."|
During the seeding livestream, Cup Rigger Boris had unwittingly predicted /mlp/ to win this cup though his usual method of picking a name from his Rigging Hat. This would mark the first time that the hat had actually picked the future cup winner, much to the disdain of the rest of the board in general.
/mlp/ started out in the knockout rounds facing /r9k/, a match nicknamed rightfully as Wizards vs. Unicorns. /r9k/ was unable to harness enough good boy points, having spent most of them on their high-scoring match against /p/, and so were defeated 3-2 with /mlp/ moving onward. The quarter-finals match found /mlp/ playing against /asp/, but not even John Cena couldn’t save them in this cage match; whereupon /asp/ was trampled 3-2. By the end of the /asp/ match, all that were left standing were /m/, /mlp/, /o/, and /v/. /m/ stepped up to the plate as the next rider, and while they managed to put up one good fight by keeping the score even at 1-1, >rape had something to say about that and managed to pull off the cheekiest of cheeky 90+ scores with help from Best Pony. Final score ended up as 2-1 /mlp/.
By this time, the bants were at an all time high, as /mlp/ had beaten the all of odds, and proven ourselves to be a formidable foe. Now, all that stood in our way to victory was /o/. /o/ has beaten us earlier in group play, 3-6 /mlp/, but our army of playtesters had run every scenario against /o/ and were confident of the strategy, intent on getting revenge on /o/ for beating /mlp/ in our own arena. /o/ put up a good fight and held the game at 3-2, but ultimately fell short at the last minute to /mlp/, 5-2, by Tracy scoring the 4th goal at 88 minutes, and >rape driving the fifth home with a cheeky 90+. We horsefuckers won and are now the first team to have legitimately earned two stars!
But all was not right back at home, as the salt began to pile up in /4ccg/. Accusations of rigging and cheating flew like tomatoes in a theater. While horsefuckers have never been ones to shy away from bants, the levels of unbridled autism was at an all time high.
In short, /mlp/ did was nobody else could do. They triggered 4chan over a stupid autistic soccer game.
|Pictured: /4ccg/ post cup.|
|Hurra! Sing along in celebration. ^:)