Libya Loves Horses more than We Do by

This past semester I have been conducting a bit of research on the Middle East, adding tremendously to my poor search history that probably already had me high up on the government's watch list. But, somewhere in the midst of typing "ISIS" into a Google search bar hundreds of times, I stumbled upon a very interesting section from the Tripoli Post of Libya.
You can't make this up: http://www.tripolipost.com/equestrian_news.asp


Now I know many of you are probably way too excited over the idea of something called a "Thoroughbred Stud Book," but hold your boners: It's not what you think it is.

The Stud Book was finally developed after a long, hard battle between the Libyan Horseman's Association and the Libyan Minister of Agriculture. So I guess the moral of the story here is that if you want to spend all day looking at hot, sweaty thoroughbred studs, work your way up to Minister of Agriculture in a country that only has about 0.99% of its land deemed "arable."

But just when you thought this couldn't get any better, wait until you hear the story behind this deceivingly non-pornographic book. Turns out that this book is a project that the Libyan Horseman's Association had been working on for seven years, which is longer than this fandom has even existed. Apparently Libya's founding fathers realized the beauty and aesthetic quality of horses, as it actually states under Libyan law that the creation of stud books for any breed of horse falls under the Ministry of Agriculture.
Artist's representation of the Libyan Horseman's Association
The history of Libya's horse fetish dates back to the 1960s, when King Idris imported them from Tunisia. But when Gaddafi took over, he put the production of the stud book under military rule. Gaddafi, fearing what the effects of looking at page after page of muscled thoroughbred studs might have on the Libyan people, essentially killed the project, depriving thousands of citizens from their favorite form of arousal.
King Idris
Many scholars believe this to be one of the driving forces behind the Arab Spring movement in Libya and the eventual overthrow of Gaddafi. There's a lesson here: Don't separate your citizens from their damn horses!
You're next, TPP!
In the meeting regarding the rebirth of the stud book, Libyan Minister of Agriculture Suliaman Bukharuba discussed how both Muslim and Libyan culture are ones of horses (seriously, can't make this shit up). He even quoted passages from the Quran and the Prophet Muhammad, who [JOKE ABOUT THE PROPHET MUHAMMAD REDACTED, PLEASE DON'T HURT ME ISIS].

At the end of a hard round of bargaining and flipping through page after page of equestrian studs, the project was financed with a whopping budget of 10 million Dinars.
Rolling in the money!
All in all, it seems that Libya is the horse-filled paradise we've all been looking for. As long as you're willing to overlook the ongoing civil war and constant threats to your life and safety, you too can be a part of a great nation that gives horses the respect they deserve.

As such, I would like to suggest a plan for gradual colonization of Libya by aficionados of horses everywhere: You guys go first.




Horse News: So strapped for coverage we're doing real horses

Comments (11)

  1. fucking blogger wont let me coment on this shit article that made me laugh.

    ReplyDelete
  2. PURPLE TRANNY
    U
    R
    P
    L
    E

    T
    R
    A
    N
    N
    Y

    ReplyDelete
  3. The U.S. killed ambassador Chris Stevens to hide the gun-smuggling from Libya to Syria.

    Thanks, Hillary Clinton.

    ReplyDelete
  4. INSHALLAH
    ISLAM RELIGION OF PEACE
    ALLAHU AKBAR

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. ISLAM SCISLAM
      S
      L
      A
      M

      S
      C
      I
      S
      L
      A
      M

      Delete
  5. Pics of aforementioned horsedicks or it didn't happen!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. https://data.desustorage.org/4ch/mlp/image/1425/25/1425257180818.jpg

      Delete
    2. I am confuss...

      Delete
    3. it's a horse dick

      Delete
  6. *Sighs* 23:32, if you slice up, mash and destroy an apple to make applesauce, do you point at the applesauce and say "look that's an apple"? No. That's no longer a horse dick, it's just a man who regrets all of his decisions.

    ReplyDelete