Crazed Horse News Intern Finally Put Over The Edge; 2 Injured by


Recently the Horse News office staff has been in a very good mood: The prolonged hiatus is ending this weekend, Babscon is also this weekend, and Newsie is finally getting laid on a daily basis. This unfortunately wasn’t enough for one Horse News intern, who had ‘broken his last straw’ earlier this morning. Details after the break.

As other Horse News writers were hard at work researching for more Newsie art pieces and nursing their hangovers, the intern only known as Anon was sent out on a coffee run. All was calm as he rode the elevator down: two employees were participating in a drinking contest with their company supplied flasks while our intern was checking out this twitter feed on his phone. Suddenly his face was contorted in anger as he stared at one particular tweet. The two employees slowed down their drinking just enough to hear him mutter to himself before flipping out and throwing his phone against the elevator doors.

“I’m sick of this meme bullshit from this fucking worthless fandom!” Anon shouted at the doors while the two frightened man-children held each other, “Every goddamn Tuesday the same routine happens over and over again. Taco Tuesday was never funny! NEVER! It was just an Equestria Girls substitute for actual show content!” Anon turned on the emergency switch in the elevator and started smirking manically as he slowly turned to the two writers. “Well, I think it’s about time I ended this ride.”

Anon then began frantically looking around the elevator until he gazed up, his smile widening. He looked down and snapped at the two: “Well what are you waiting for, get down on your knees! I’ve got work to do.” The two sobbed as they bent down on their knees. They had seen enough porn to know where this was going. The two were shaking as Anon took off his pants and shirt only to stand on top of them and lift the ceiling tile up.

Before they knew it, Anon was gone, but his crazed rambling echos of ‘Taco Tuesday’ could still be heard as they scrambled for their phones and called for help. So far no one has been able to find him in the elevator shaft, but several other employees have felt thumps in their offices. However, this could just be their hangovers talking.

In other news, a new internship slot has opened up! We pay hourly in booze, used horse plushies and self esteem issues. Porn of overused Brony memes not included.


Comments (13)

  1. Equestria Girls Content > Show Content
    Deal with it.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I'm already at /pone/.

      Delete
    2. gr8 b8 m8 i r8 it 8/8 will convers8 it to k8 on our l8 d8 at 8 no h8

      Delete
  2. "used horse plushies"

    Sign me the fuck up.

    ReplyDelete
  3. I just got fired guys. Thanks

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Well what did you expect when you clicked "Newsie is finally getting laid on a daily basis"?

      Delete
    2. For one thing, I wasn't expecting anthro.

      Delete
    3. Goes on HN arcticle, thinking it's safe.
      Where do you think your browsing anon?

      Delete
  4. >"see you next week!"

    ReplyDelete
  5. yea coz horse-news.net looks good on the resume

    ReplyDelete