Future US President condemns MandoPony's behavior by


No one in this world is clean of sins. Not even the folks here at Horse News, your favorite family friendly pony news site. However, the one thing that's inexcusable? Promoting disgusting humor and behavior as a celebrity. Even as a Horse Famous "celebrity," one must set an example. It's been recently brought to us that MandoPony has duped us for too long with his disgusting behavior, and it took an up and coming politician to show us the truth about Mando.


George Cain, a Chemical Engineering undergrad from Cleveland, has been present on the political scene for several years now. More specifically Twitter and YouTube where he shares his political thoughts that are viewed by maybe dozens of people every month. With his keen interest in the political universe, leaning towards the Christian Conservative side of things, Cain has made his political aspirations very public, announcing his run for US Senate and then President of the United States. 


While he's both a devout servant of Yahweh and led by Jesus Christ, Cain is also a dedicated Brony, proclaiming Rainbow Dash as "his heartbeat." This, of course, following the second commandment of "...You shall not bow down to [other likenesses] nor serve them. With the exception of your favorite cartoon characters. Accept for Sonata, my waifu." Once he entered the fandom, Cain took it upon himself to be the watchdog of the fandom to keep us all on the right track. That's when Cain noticed MandoPony and his music.

While Cain said he was "once a fan," it seems that is no longer true. First noticing the ungodly nature in the classic Better than You, the hymn of all DashFags, Cain noticed something strange. That under back tracking and clever ponilluminati editing, you can hear Mando saying, and I apologize in advance to anyone reading this article with their children after Youth Group, the f-word. Completely censored and said once or twice, but still there to corrupt our well adjusted, God fearing youth. 

Again, we're sorry you had to listen to this. We know how awful it must be for you.

The rabbit hole didn't stop there. The worst of it all comes from Mando's infamous mega hit, Horse Famous. While this song was written as a love letter to FinalDraft and his wonderful ways, it seems it too came with some unfortunate alternate agenda. Turning us all in the ponyphiles. More specifically, to forcefully have sexual intercourse in the mounting position for the sole purpose insemination with Cain's wife, Rainbow Dash.

Yep, Mando some how put in the acronym I.W.T.C.I.R.D. unnoticed. Until now.

Please brace yourself and send the kids out of the room. The acronym stands for, and we once again apologize for the graphic nature here, "I want to cum inside Rainbow Dash." You can pause to ask Yahweh for forgiveness if you wish.

We know this music is insulting to your ears. Don't worry, it's over now.

Thankfully, this community has someone like Cain on the watch. Since his findings, he has now called out MandoPony publicly in the video above and on Twitter. When reached for comment, Mando simply laughed. While he knows he's been caught, he continues to spread his disgusting message across the fandom, knowing that the lame brain liberal media over at EquestriaDaily and, to a less important extent EverfreeNetwork, would never bring the story to light.



It seems even Cain's own mother was in on the conspiracy, ordering a ban on all MLP material in the house. In desperation, Cain prayed then reached for sympathy in the community.




What Mando and his cronies didn't count on was the fair and balanced coverage here at Horse News. We got you, you tool of the devil. At this time, Mando has not been reached for comment. But we think his actions speak for themselves.


It's just a good thing we were emailed the link to his YouTube, or else his wonderful work may have gone unnoticed on a larger scale. For instance, his take on the love and tolerant nature of the fandom and its connections to the LGBT community are made apparent in this video in which he apologizes to Maud Pie's VA Ingrid Nilson. In the video he declares his hatred for the "Gay Agenda in western civilization."


Or his message to "everypony" at Hasbro, DHX, and the fans to keep MLP pure and stay true to its God sent nature.


No matter what the problem, no matter how deep or how hard, we know that Cain is right around the corner to lay down the light. Clad in his finest Republican suit, flag pin, with bible in one arm and Rainbow Dash plushie and the other, Cain is part of the common people, a real mans man. Which is why Horse News is officially endorsing George Cain for President in 2028, just as MLP enters its 18th season.

Now let us leave you with the Horse News verse of the day, sponsored by Chick-Fil-A and Hobby Lobby.



"with all humility and gentleness, with patience, bearing with one another in love. Even the worst pony known as Rainbow Dash." 
 -Ephesians 4:2


"Do not stay on the road of temptations, my brothers. Take the righteous path, less ye be a faggot." - Horse News friend and founder of Troll Inc., Christopher Poole

Comments (55)

  1. Replies
    1. Care to explain yourself, Mando?

      IF that's even your real name?

      Delete
    2. Ok ... you caught me ... it's been my plan all along to hide subliminal messages in brony songs to secretly corrupt the youth of America with my liberal agenda. Also I'm pushing the gay agenda, but I was kind of hoping that wasn't a secret by now.

      Also, my real name is Daniel. Sorry for all the damage I have caused, my fellow bronies. :(

      Delete
    3. Mando, further questions. Do you plan on making a press release and if so will we have exclusive rights to it?

      Also, do you wish to cum inside Rainbow Dash or is Sibsy your one true waifu?

      Delete
    4. Critic, is that even a question?
      Of course he wants to cum inside, his lyrics said so.
      Lyrics always are true.

      Delete
    5. Wait, wasn't the entire point of the fandom to corrupt the youth of America and to push the gay agenda?

      Delete
    6. His real name is Mandonna.

      Delete
    7. "Mandonna" ... that is freaking brilliant. Can I steal that? I'm stealing that.

      Delete
    8. Steal it, and make a video of you in a spike bra, bad make up, and doing the vogue

      Delete
    9. I find it funny how the majority of the people who decided to post ponies back in late 2010 were actually sexually in love with ponies, although most don't wish to admit it, if it weren't for these people who truly do wish to IWTCIRD then people like Cain wouldn't even be a brony, it's like a domino effect, and once one person who has a higher standing on the internet hears of it, likes it and then shares it out to the hundreds and thousands of fans following him, it doesn't stop, also like a plague (which is why some people call it the pony plague); but yeah I've been a brony for a LOOOONG time, and I saw the fandom grow into what it is now, and if people really gave it a second thought they'd probably even forgive the people who got them into ponies, it shouldn't honestly matter in the end if they are sexually attracted to them or idolise them or not.

      Delete
  2. Oh, George Cain. He was also bugging show staff awhile back because he really, really wanted to write for the show.

    ReplyDelete
  3. Ah, this guy. Noticed him for the first time when he complained about Ashleigh Ball supporting gay rights. Later, he appeared to be "worried" about the scene of Lyra and Bon Bon together in Rainbow Rocks. He claimed (or at least implied) that he doesn't hate gay people when I addressed him about it, which is weird considering how clear his position otherwise is. He seems to be an Andrew Schlafly kind of guy: A ludicrously stereotypical American conservative.

    I think he and Mando should fight to death. No matter who loses, it's one douchebag less on the world.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. an epic rap battle of equestria, him vs mando.

      Delete
    2. Everyone would lose in that battle, friend-o.

      Delete
    3. The only way to lose is not to play.

      Delete
    4. You are correct in saying that I don't hate gay people. I simply hate what they do, because it leads to death, and I hate death. I hate the deed, not the person. Anyone who is unable to separate the deed from the person lacks a basic life skill, IMO.

      Delete
    5. Flameheart, we're not laughing with you here. We're laughing at you. Your arrogance is, frankly, stunning. Your belief that being gay leads to death is very concerning. At best you're misguided and arrogant, and at worst, you're sociopathic. You do realize that your videos your posting are rather frightening? You sound like a future mass murderer. I think something is wrong with your head.

      Delete
    6. Flameheart Kindle9 December 2014 at 13:58

      If you say so. I think I've been rather civil with my remarks, but maybe I'm biased.

      Delete
    7. Okay, you've been civil, Flameheart. But you look like a doofus when you do stuff like this.

      In the past, you've sought out cast members endorsements of political positions that they didn't even associate with the show and then called either for them to be removed from the show or expressed your disdain. In both cases, literally no one cares. You want to dislike acts of homosexuality or criticize the transgender community. Fine. You can do that. You have every right to express your opinion. But, you've gone as far as harassing members of the fandom (Mando et al.) and cast members (Ingrid Nilson, Ashleigh Ball, etc.). That's where the line needs to be drawn.

      Furthermore, you have to understand that you have a conception of the fandom that's grossly delusional. Yes, the show may be wholesome and intended for both younger and older audiences. But, if you think that there are any mainstream fandoms out in the world of the internet or pop culture that don't support LGBT rights or whatever, then you're living in an entirely different world than the rest of us. Even the Catholic church, an institution that fought tooth and nail against equal rights for those of different sexual orientations, has become more progressive as far as that issue goes. My only guess is that you're an Evangelical Christian, in which case I'm not surprised that you have the views that you do.

      Anyway, to end all these digressions, my main point is that you can have these views, Flameheart. No one will stop you from having the insane, sheltered worldview that you have. But, don't be surprised that you're getting shit on the internet about it. You're protected against censorship or persecution based on your speech by the 1st Amendment. But that only means that someone with a position of civil power (i.e. a person in some level of government) cannot censor you. That does not by any means protect you from being criticized by the general public should you so choose to express yourself.

      Delete
  4. Horse News > Fox News

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. This comment has been removed by the author.

      Delete
  5. Damn it, why do my fellow Christians always do this? I just wanted to enjoy Ponies and Jesus, but nope, not on this guy's watch!

    Sigh... I sincerely apologize on the behalf of all Christians. Or at least the Methodists.

    P.S. Great article.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. This comment has been removed by the author.

      Delete
    2. Why apologize? You didn't do anything wrong. Just be the best pony that you can be. Y'know?

      Delete
  6. This guy is either some real hardcore poe's law, or some messed up kid.

    Also Mando is pretty tame now I guess.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Flameheart Kindle9 December 2014 at 14:01

      I'm just a messed-up kid.

      Delete
  7. So is this the substitution article for what's going on with /pol/ and their multiple failed attempts to enact the sampson option until we figure out what the fucks going on?

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. /pol/ is not /mlp/. So I'm guessing their just going to sit back, laugh, and jack off some more

      Delete
  8. Ha! This is amazing. Not only did Mando put in the extra effort to hide illuminati-style acronyms in his music, some guy actually took the time to seek out those acronyms and get angry about them.

    What a time to be alive.

    ReplyDelete
  9. Uhhh... What does Wildfire have to say about all this? Does she know her Mando secretly desires the Dash?

    ReplyDelete
  10. I'm sure the guy never has seen R34 of the show lol

    ReplyDelete
  11. WINTER WRAP UP
    WINTER WRAP UP
    CAN SOMEONE KILL ME PLEASE

    ReplyDelete
  12. Man creates God, man kills God, man types up bronyfaggotry to garner attention, bronyfaggotry destroys man.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Dinosaurs inherit the Earth

      Delete
    2. Germans gain national pride

      Delete
  13. I felt sad for the Dash plush. Plushes shouldn't be thrown out or owned by Flameheart.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Flameheart Kindle9 December 2014 at 14:02

      Ha! Good one.

      Delete
    2. Now he can't secretly IWTCIRD and then blame his shameless actions on everyone else.

      Delete
  14. Hi guys. It's me, George Cain.

    I laughed so hard reading this article.... Horse News is like the Onion of the brony fandom... oh my sides... haha

    Thanks for the endorsement, Horse News, but unfortunately I won't be eligible to run for President until 2032. :)

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I want to cum inside Rainbow Dash.

      Delete
    2. You want to... what inside me?

      Delete
  15. >Christian
    >Rainbow Dash

    Okay, I'm kind of confused.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Confused about what? That I have a favorite character?

      Delete
    2. RD is basically the prankster (remember loki in Norse religion), and most likely the one of the only characters in the show to actually be closely related to satan's disciples in some way. Despite Chrysalis who 'needs' to feed on love and shimmer and nightmarenight who was 'confused' about her life, RD actually chooses to undertake in mischief activities, and on top of that she shows an abundance of arrogance and self-pride, and also her character was supposed to be the rebel of the group of 6 main characters...
      You do realise that the show wasn't made specifically for Christians right? it wouldn't even matter to Hasbro if they had hidden away a few things in the show like female on female relationships (perhaps this was the intent for lyra and bon bon), and other things which breach Christian belief in some way. Film studios for children just have to worry about a few things including whether it's family friendly, doesn't breach any clear illegality, shows a clear moral by the end of it, and can actually make them money. The don't make MLP to suit religious people or I'm sure they would have brought a pony GOD into it at some point in time resembling the Christian human one (also celestia doesn't represent god at all if that's what you thought).

      Delete
  16. I think we've got a Social Conservative Warrior in our midst.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Still beats having SJWs. Wait, we have them too. Isn't it just dandy

      Delete
  17. What a charming young man. He sounds like someone with principles. A real American. Someone who'll keep prayer in schools and keep the niggers, faggots and women in their place. He's got my vote.

    ReplyDelete
  18. >Rainbow Dash
    >worst pony

    This is why I'm an atheist

    ReplyDelete
  19. George Cain, as an American do you prefer phalluses or anal plugs?

    ReplyDelete
  20. George Cain, please go to Russia where people share your fundamentalist, bigeted values. :^)

    ReplyDelete