New Developments: Mr. Cake Tries to Swindle Pinkies Poon by

Is this the face of mercy?

Mr. Cake has just attempted to coerce Pinkie Pie into adultery, leading too an absolutely tremendous amount of #REKT exploding from the pink pony's mouth. Mr. Cake tried to pimp the pony out for the night to allieviate his decrepid sex life by hreatening her livelihood and home. In response Ms. Pie exploded into a rage of rekt.


"you pasty yellow toothpick framed fuck?" was quoted from the pink mare in response to Mr. Cake's bad attempt at a hook up.

Pinkie was apparently fed up with Mr. Cake's pathetic excuse for a husband and exploded into a maelstrom of insults and remarks towards the yellow horse. She began by calling out the horse on his pickup lines and immediately dumping him into the trash of the friendzone. She then went on a tirade, picking out individual lacking traits of Mr. Cake, calling him "more anorexic than fluttershy" and going on about how he smells like shit.


Pinkie's sarcastic remarks perfectly encapsulated the situation and highlighted the pathetic-ness of Mr. Cake. She also spilled the beans on the reason behind Mr. Cake's lacking sex life; He just wasn't good enough for her. 
'Hey Pinkie! Let me rut you like a cheap whorse and you can keep your job?'
It was told by pinkie in the cap below that Mrs. Cake has been cheating on Mr. Cake all his adult life, having extra-marital affairs at any chance she could get. She would apparently casually fuck any living thing that walked by, any of course other than Mr. Cake. 


The defeated Mr. Cake was casually escorted to the burn center after suffering from rekt in the 3rd degree. His current condition is currently unknown, but the burn center is attempting to salvage any shred of dignity that cake has left in his person.

Anon had this to say in response to Mr. Cake getting rekt:
"Rekt"


It is unknown now whether or not Mr. Cake and Mrs. Cake are going to remain a couple after each party is shown to be complete cunts, but since Mr. Cake is a pathetic butt-muncher that cant even question two bastard children, he will probably do nothing. If your baby came out looking like Al Sharpton and both of you were white as a snowball, what the hell would you do? 

Hi Daddy! Gib alimony 
Mr. Cake of course would do absolutely nothing. But who couldn't resist the Pinks pink? Its hard enough for married men in a different universe, let alone a horny stallion in her own.


Comments (17)

  1. This article is bad and you should feel bad

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  2. What the fuck is this pile of steaming horse shit?!

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  3. I don't even. Not even EFN or EqD is THIS autistic. Seriously, Jim...why are you even here?

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  4. This is fucking beautiful Jim.

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  5. >This is fucking beautiful Jim.
    >What the fuck is this pile of steaming horse shit?!
    All of horse news comment section posts in two lines

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  6. Mr Cake is such a dum horse.

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  7. Love this article. Best article from this website. XD

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  8. It's obvious Pink Pone needs sum fuk.

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  9. Autism begets autism begets autism begets autism and so on.

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  10. You don't link directly to images hosted on 4chan.org - you get that mess of an error up top.

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  11. It was a good article, I laughed.

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  12. It for da best, really. Pink got da syphilis. For serious. Got it frum Hitler.

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  13. >4chan.org
    HN staff, please tell me you are not that newfag

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  14. >Is this the face of Mercy?
    >4chan.org.
    Wow, way to be cheap with your brandwidth, faggots.

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  15. How appalling! I never would've imagined such things to be happening in a civilized society... In any case, does anybody happen to have Mrs Cake phone number?

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  16. I personally think Discord made the twins non-earthponies. For exactly this reason.

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