Horse Fame - The Fire Rises: Sites, Songs, and Shirts? by

Peter New: Officially HorseFamous

When Horse-News first started following people on twitter, the question arose many times if that signified an achievement of "HorseFamous" status. The simple answer then was "fuck if we know", but we developed a tool to help those questioning souls have their questions answered; the "Horse-Fame Analyzer".

Since then, things have gotten a bit more complicated, AND SUPER SERIOUS.

People are getting robbed in search of horse-fame, and Horse-News (the clear authority on these matters) is here to show you how you can achieve Horse-Fame and still stay safe and sane (relatively speaking).
Now, you COULD achieve horsefame by working hard to create memorable, enjoyable content for the fanbase, by creating artwork, videos, music, or organizing tasks or providing some sort of service to the community at large. OR, you could take a short-cut. What kinds of short-cuts?
More on that later, but First a brief history of HorseFame.


After the Horse-Fame analyzer tool (which has been used by over 3000 people by the way) a twitter appeared, with an unknown purpose (perhaps just to fill the internet's need to make things exist), dubbed simply "@horsefamous", begging people to "not take it seriously", accompanied by a webpage (that is literally just a picture of Scootaloo with the word "horsefamous" written above it). This is likely part of some larger conspiracy at work that nobody can quite understand yet. (We blame the Poluminati).

THAT website was followed by another, much more elaborate webpage called "AreYouHorseFamous", which contains semi-detailed descriptions of some of the most well-known people in all of Equinity.
The list seems to get longer on occasion as new names are added. Who is running that page is still a mystery, but as with most things, Horse-News is run by a bunch of lazy assholes isn't terribly interested in figuring it out either, despite having reported on its existence over a month ago.


Then of course is the song, that Mandopony released this week, tying the whole experience of #horsefame together in a neat little package. The song was released the week after BABScon, where Capper revealed the #HorseFamous tshirts to the masses -the official indication that a person had, in-fact achieved #horsefamous status - and as it turns out, he didn't have enough.


Mic the Microphone secured his place in the halls of #horsefame history with a shirt of his very own, which he had signed by people of non-#horsefame status from all around the con. It was apparently stolen shortly later, by someone seeking to gain its power. Our expert scientists warn the public that this is highly dangerous thing to attempt. The last person that tried to gain horse fame by taking it from another met with a horrible fate (legend is he had the entirety of FIMfiction beamed directly into his head). Think the scene from Raiders of the Lost Ark where they open the box, but with less nazis and more sweaty guys in MLP shirts.

Are you willing to risk your life for HorseFame?

Actually, don't answer that.

But you shouldn't.

We really don't want to be held liable for your half-baked scheme to be known as the "Brony who can swallow the most stuff under the sink", completing your "OC with a Drain-O Cutiemark" motif, especially when it can be achieved, the easy way (ALMOST 100% nazi free).


That's right, for a nominal fee, now you can just BUY guaranteed horsefame from Etsy, the same way that Americans do nearly all of their self-identification - other than in bumper stickers and facebook "likes" - in shirt form. Capper is selling the same shirts from BABScon over here removing all risk of bodily injury or self-inflicted insanity that is usually associated with acquiring Horse-Fame.

So, what is next for the most serious hashtag on the interwebs?

My bet: Broadway plays based on a memoir. Or, more realistically, a bumpersticker.

Comments (7)

  1. Ugh......I want no part of this.

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    1. [NO FUN ALLOWED]

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  2. It's not that I don't want people to have fun. I just don't want people to make fools of themselves. Moreover, just wearing a shirt that says "horse-famous" doesn't make you so. It's like a line from The Incredibles. If you make EVERYONE special, then NOBODY is special. You understand my point?

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    1. That sir IS the joke of this ENTIRE THING.

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    2. Thats the point. We are jealous of popular fandom identities (Dont you dare deny this Critic) so we make fun of them pretending it even matters. If we cant enjoy fame no one can.

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  3. Jesus fuck, is that really Peter New in the OP? He looks ugly as fuck there.

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    1. He's trying to look ugly, as a joke, in that image. I'm pretty sure.

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