"Best Pony" Competition Comes To A Close With Fallout Of New Episode; Also There's a Synopsis by

Alright Sombreros of the world. Time to reign it in there, Dashfags. Calm down there those remaining owners of Twilight dakimakuras. After Saturday's episode, Maud Pie is the undoubtable winner here and forever of the title, "Best Pony". Get the post-episode review below!

Undoubtedly, last Saturday's episode was an experience in dry humor with a touch of depth as we were able to peer into the mind. Let's get started on recapping this monument of sediments.

PONIES! We have to cook.
Early on we see Pinkie Pie, while goofy, appears to be in constraint as opposed to her "Filli Vanilli" and most other S4 performances. It's a good sign early on. Post intro-section exposition has Twilight acting more and more like a mentor to the rest of the Mane 6. Other horsefuckers would cry out at her being more and more of a know-it-all Mary Sue than she already is, but I see it as a natural progression. She's purplesmart, and as such it only seems fitting for her to become more and more accustomed to dealing with problems whilst also providing her own aura as a sage guidance with the Princess title, much like Celestia did with her back in Season 1. Pinkie declares that her as-yet-unseen-save-a-photo-in-the-other-good-Pinkie-episode sister is coming to visit, and the two share a rich history of rock necklaces.


Huh. I didn't know Poneh worked for the show.
We get another look at the inner mechanisms of Pinkie's mind in another art style that's fun, but admittedly a bit less imaginative and more simple than the others. Makes for a good post-shot gag though. Pinkie also mentions after her sketchy soliloquy that Maud has been sending her rock-candy necklaces every year since the pink horse moved to Ponyville. Seeing as how a filly Pinkie was seen throwing a large party in the town in Cheese Sandwhich's flashback in "Pinkie Pride", we can assume that Maud has always had a soft spot for her little sister.Pinkie also declares that Maud was coming by to visit on her way to going on-site for her "Rockterate in Rock Science". Heh.


I guess this was part of her
 pre-nup with Tom
Heading out for a picnic to greet the sure to be new best friend, the girls all gather and gossip about the newcomer. Rarity also wears this rockin' hat. 

Over the hill and bounding to her friends, Pinkie comes with the reminder that all the ponies are sure to love her sister. Maud is, apparently, into poetry, loves woodland things, is great at games, and has a good sense of honesty and fashion. Hitting all the bases as a true jack-of-all-trades. Marvelous Maud, simply marvelous.

Lo and behold! Coming over the horizon and keeping her presence in tandem for all those who are dripping at the maw in absolute tension to meet this exquisite creature, Clyde Maud is expertly accompanied by studious Gummy to the ponies. Gracefully taking in the natural scenery, she immediately demands a powerful presence and makes the air about her stiff in the fear that it would somehow show insolence towards her sophisticated demeanor.


Unmatched poise and deliberation
She even pauses for the briefest of moments to take into account the geology of the Equestrian wilderness. 
"Hm, sedimentary. This is a sedimentary rock," -Maud Pie, 2014
I'm blown away. Blown. Away.

As it would seem, however, the ponies are less-than enthused to meet the Pie sister. Quick introductions are exchanged, followed by Rarity's attempts to connect with Maud on a fashion level, asking her what her "frock says". To which Maud drops yet another amazing line, "It doesn't talk; it's a dress". Overwhelmed by this realization with spaghetti dripping from her hat, Rarity decidedly backs away before being handed another lesson in fashion. After, the mention of pets is brought up. Maud then introduces us to her own companion 
on the trip, her wee friend Boulder "The Rock". One can only imagine what the little collection of minerals is cookin'. Instantly the generally upbeat, fast-paced show takes a dramatic pull on the emergency break with Maud's presence. It opens up a lot of avenues for a series of dry humor gags not usually seen in the show, and is a great change of pace. Maud feels so out of place and jarring that she fits in her own way. A lot of it comes from how Pinkie Pie's attempts to return to the show's status quo don't feel forced as transitions from awkward conversational pauses often do. She genuinely loves both her friends and her sister and has her heart set on the two factions hitting it off.



Maud partook in a few cupcakes from Applejack, before suggesting to the cast they invest in a small game of Camouflage. It's like Hide-and-Seek, but way more intense.

The silly ponies could do little in the game, as Maud was an esteemed master. Rocks were unturned, sites were dug, and souls were searched in the near day-long venture to find little Boulder. A lesson from Gollum taken here, as the rock was in her pocket the entire time! A genius tactical move from the mind of Maud.

With Pinkie and Maud's departure to go fix up the rock candy, the other five consoled with each other. Naturally, their peppy moods and technicolor aesthetics didn't match well with the new addition. Twilight came in to say that, perhaps her quiet exterior didn't work well with so many new people at one time, and that she was a little over-loaded. A suggestion that they all meet with her individually and try their each unique brand of fun was given, and Rarity set off to make Maud some proper clothes to take on her dig site.

HAH. As if Maud needs the help of lesser ponies. Even the Aryan masterrace takes the index from the rock pone's encyclopedia of exquisite-ness.

In the following scenes Maud...



 Dismissed the advances of a humble spider...                 crafted a beautiful scarf...


 Disclosed a number of passage from her thousands of volumes of Rock-based poetry...


Crushed some apples mercilessly then drank their fluids...


She even gave us a touch of wet-mane. Take a note here folks; the real gift is knowing how to give.

However no matter how much the ponies tried to connect with simple Maud, they were unable to make themselves welcome through her tough, rocky exterior. They voiced their discontent to Pinkie Pie, of whom deflated (literally) and retreated to her 200 pounds of rock candy to concoct one last plan to unify the band.

She calls it "Pinkie-Rari-Rainbow-Twi-Apple-Flutter-Maud Fun Time"
Sounds like one hell of a ship to me. Hopefully it won't sink.
The bombastic obstacle course showcased elements from each of the ponies' interests; cupcakes, Poker Night at the Zoo's Inventory, an apple-corpse tunnel, luxurious shiny towels, high-impact sexual reading, and a rock slide of all things. I wonder what that last one is for. Huh. Get back to me on that.

Pinkie attempts to navigate the gauntlet, only to be beset by a trap on the latter-mentioned rockslide. The massive rock at the pinnacle threatens to smash her into a pink paste and rid the world of any more Season 4 Pinkie shenanigans, when the purple-gray colored horse jumps to the rescue.

Donned is a glorious German Picklehaub, Maud navigates the corpse tunnel, blasts through the fabric, and blasts into the massive rock. Drilling into the clod, she disintegrates it with narry a fuck to give. Well, not really. A genuinely touching moment follows, as older sister embraces younger and slightly scolds her. In her monotone, it hits home hard to see the stone-faced horse show strong compassion towards anything that isn't Boulder. Seeing how tryhard-ey the Mane 6 are, Maud decides to end the awkward situation altogether by leaving for the Rock Farm before going on her rock trip. Throughout, there's a real sense that Maud is a bit... touched. More on that after the synopsis. The Mane 6 realize that, even though there's little in common between them and Maud, they share one incredibly vital bond, their shared love for Pinkie Pie and her well-being.

Somehow they're able to beat the two moving by train to the Rock Farm, and make rock candy necklaces together as a sign of their mutual friendship for the little pink horse. At the very end, it looks like Maud can't bear to stomach the idea of eating something her sister makes, as she's seen to have kept every rock candy necklace they've ever made. It would appear, though, that she actually can't stomach candy in general. Regardless, she admits "I don't really like candy, but I do love Pinkie Pie". Aww.

The episode was ridden with hilarious pauses and silences following Maud's dry comments, and to see the character acting so quickly and efficiently at the climax was a perfect display of how she could so quickly change gears in an instant for her sister. Much like "Sisterhooves Social" and unlike the recent "Somepony To Watch Over Me", the subtle bond of unrequited love between siblings is displayed expertly, bringing a number of d'awws with it. It does get to be a bit slow and awkward for the audience at times, with the advent of something as "Rock Candy Best Friend Necklaces" seeming a shade too girly and childish for the crowd I'm writing to, but then again how many things have you and your siblings have to share that would seem out of place and ill-mannered to others?

The main elephant in the room references the idea of "Clyde Pie", that Maud is a bit touched in the head for the average horse. She speaks slowly and deliberately, same with her blinking, is obsessed with inanimate objects and knows 
indescribable amounts of information about them, and displayed a showcase of, *ahem*, "retard strength", for lack of a better term. Perhaps this is the closest the show has gotten to an actual autistic character being in the cast, the other closest occurrence of uncomfortable shortness in ability being Scootaloo's flying disability. The awkwardness in interacting with the character as shown by the socially-apt main cast is very realistic, and expected when discussing normal manners of having fun with someone who doesn't see the world as someone running on all gears would. Her distance from 
reality and assurance with whom she was made a great combination, and surely one of the most memorable characters in the show to come. I can only hope she makes a return in a future season, because Maud is, without any hesitation, the best pony.

Rating: 8.5/10 Hilarious timing (for once), Pinkie was in form, and the new addition to the one-off character cast was spot-on. A few awkward moments here or there held it back from being god-tier.


Also this rooster is GOAT. Praise be the prophet of the morn, Docter Cocktopus.

A few anons of /mlp/ were able to snoop around and found a few passages from Maud's various poetry collections. A few of my favorites follow.

Poems by Maud Pie
A series of poems collected by the Anons of /mlp/ from Maud's marvelous archives.

I know rocks, I know them by heart.
they are gray brown and hard, just like a rock.
I pick up a brown rock. It is not hard, very much unlike a rock.
I put it down.

Rock.
Rock on the hill.
A thrill.
It is sitting there still.

Smooth and gray.
On the ground they stay.
Or in my pocket.
Hard as a rocket.
Red Rocket.
Rocks.

One rock. Two rock.
three rock. Four.
pink rock, ink rock, blink rock, more.

Rocks are the things I love
This is a haiku I wrote
It is about rocks.

When I see you.
My heart is filled with lava.
Which are rocks.
Only warm.

Rocks.
I love rocks.
Rocks to eat.
Rocks named Pete.
Boulder's cousins.
All are rocks.
They rock.

I like rocks
because they are gray
like rocks

R is for Rocks
O is for Rocks
C is for Rocks
K is for Rocks
S is for Rocks
Rocks


Comments (7)

  1. Something that came up when I finished watching this one: except for Pinkie, the rest of the crew weren't very entertaining to watch. They acted too "normal" to be very interesting. However, Maud, despite being obviously "plain", was far more interesting because of how plain she was. That's what I loved about the episode. She never stopping being a strange character by the show's standards, and therefore made for a great character. In a way, it reminds me of another episode with a very strange character...Twilight, in Lesson Zero.

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  2. I was wondering when this was going to be posted. Not too bad writing from Gayman, good job on that, faggot. What happened to the other guy?

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    1. Powdi pls get back to making Smogonsword look good.

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    2. >every anon who goes in on /4ccg/ and also goes on HN must be someone from the circlejerk
      Yeah, nah

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  3. This comment has been removed by the author.

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  4. It feels really weird to simultaneously think of Maud as being awesome, but also autismal as fuck. Normally those two terms are mutually exclusive.

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    1. It happens man. It's all where your "retard points" go I guess.

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